I could hear cats hissing and spitting at each other out in the alley, so I switched on the porch lights and went charging after them with the only thing I could quickly find to cause a ruckus more dramatic than the one they were creating: a ten foot long bamboo pole. I whacked at the laurel, sending cats scattering. (I was thankful for the relative darkness.)
Warning! Crazy lady charging through the July night brandishing a long bamboo spear!
In my rush to break up the fight, I brushed up against the overgrown collard "trees" in my garden, and when I came back into the yard, the air smelled pungently and heavily of brassica, like someone had just overcooked a brimming cauldron of broccoli.
(I really must stop having these exciting Saturday evenings.)
I looked just like this (minus the water, plus it was dark):
I am sure you did look exactly like that!
ReplyDeleteAngella, I'm glad you recognize that.
Delete(Tee hee.)
T - thank you for the chuckle! As happens, I had to deal with two warring cats about seventeen hours ago, too. Horrible yowling and Bits of white and ginger fluff flying all over the place. . . Not having a ten foot bamboo stick to brandish* I had to turn my voice into a combination of spear, water-blaster, harbour siren, bearded man and roaring lion. It did my system good and sent the cats scattering. As you say, we really must do something about our thrilling weekend evenings?!)
ReplyDeleteL, C xo
(* Haha - here's a new title for you: The Bamboo Brandisher of Brandon Street'?)
Ha, Claire, I'd have to change "Street" to "Boulevard" to keep all that wonderful alliteration going!
DeleteNice ass:)
ReplyDeleteWhy thank you!
Delete;-)