At the risk of sounding cliche and woo-woo, I want to pass along some of my new philosophy/practice that has, well, changed my life.
Upon the end of my marriage two years ago, I decided to try, and I mean try, to approach every situation/person from a standpoint of loving kindness. And I'll say right out that it hasn't necessarily been an easy thing. It's called a practice because one has to, well, practice it. It's so much easier to practice resentment, anger, envy, crabbiness, irritability, etc. I admit to having failed miserably and to also having succeeded fantastically in this venture.
And the longer I practice, the easier it becomes.
My mantra:
No expectations, no grievances.
Just right now, this moment, all in loving kindness.
In the past few months, this has begun to pay off. I've started the process of healing broken or damaged relationships, with astonishing and surprising results. It almost feels a little selfish, because I receive so much more back than I feel I deserve for the energy I put out. But it's not really about deserving, but about giving.
I was talking to my younger son about this, and he said that he loves going into a store and seeing how many people he can get to smile, or laugh. I love this!
It's not complicated, and it works, and I say this knowing that I may go to the end of my life with unfinished business re: forgiveness. But there is still time, and not one of us really knows what lies beyond the next corner.
Anyway, I'll get down off my soapbox now, but not before saying that I recommend this highly.
Thank you t. I need this guidance mightily today.
ReplyDeleteI work with a woman, a good christian woman, who is a anything but christlike. She also brings out the worst in me and I find myself behaving like her at times which infuriates me. Then I am angry with myself and with her. It is a downward spiral that I let her drag me down into.
ReplyDeleteThank you for the reminder that I can choose to act differently.
I love this. And it's something I needed to read this morning, as I've been dealing lately with some nasty little emotions that make me ashamed of myself. Mostly envy, resentment, and self pity. Your post gave me something to consider. Thank you! :)
ReplyDeleteit is a good and worthy practice, T. I practice it as well. Just this morning some gal left a nasty note on my windshield because I parked too close to her. My gut started to tighten, and then I realized she is probably in need of some loving-kindness, and so I gave it to her. She is a stranger to me, I don't even remember what she looked like (she pulled in just as I did), and I don't know where she is. But wherever she is, a wish her a peaceful heart and a joyus day.
ReplyDeleteYes!
ReplyDeleteYour son's comment reminded me, of a past husband's very accusing remark 'Why is it, that everywhere we go people smile at you?' How to reply, when you don't know? I think I said something along the lines of 'I think I must have a happy face!' Thinking about it many times since, all my life folk have smiled at me; I must just have a jolly demeanour, added to which throughout, I have tried to always look on the bright side, even in my darkest hours.
ReplyDeleteLLX