I like thinking of The Law as a bog, as swampy ground through which one slogs. Ordinarily I would say there are many things about a swamp that I love, but this one is replete with craggy stumps and sinking subterrain.
Here's something that's been occupying the brain these past two months:
How can a human be a partner in an intimate relationship, with all the reciprocal subtle and affectionate touches and declarations of love and fidelity, and then do a complete 180 in a matter of hours? With no warning? Just a black-and-white flip to the other side: get out, don't want to talk to you, don't want to see you, call my attorney.
As a loving inhabitant of this planet, I've come to the conclusion that this is something I will never understand. I'll get used to the idea of it -- maybe -- and accept that it will remain one of the great conundrums of my life, the puzzle to which I'll never find the missing piece: nine-hundred and ninety-nine out of a thousand.
In the meantime, I've plastered myself with "fragile" stickers: one on my brain, the other over my heart. A desperate attempt at protection, in a world made entirely of glass.
Oh, dear. I'll be careful and handle you like the finest crystal. Remember, though, what temperatures glass can sustain -- you are strong.
ReplyDeleteHave you discovered yet what he was hiding?
ReplyDeleteOh, you are so fragile right now and it is not surprising. You are often in my thoughts - I find it so hard to comprehend how he could have treated you like that and betrayed your trust.
ReplyDeleteI'm with Cro Magnon. Meanwhile, handle yourself with care. X
ReplyDeleteit's not you.
ReplyDeletepeople who behave that way have all kinds of criss-crossed wiring inside that you never saw. and may never see, no matter how carefully you look.
it may even be that, someday, you will have an epiphany that you escaped.
Go easy, T. Be good to yourself. You were blindsided and of course feel fragile. Just keep writing--in all your moods--it is one place where you can continue to be your strong and beautiful self and where you won't be hurt. xo
ReplyDeleteI also agree with Cro......what IS he hiding? And WHY? And you ARE lucky to have "escaped". It's not about you, it's about him. Be thankful to be done with the guy!
ReplyDeleteReally, it is astonishing that he let you down to the degree he did....NO ONE deserves that and he needs to atone for his actions!
Ima Befuddled
Such emotional events are not different than accidents after which the victim(s) would be treated for shock and watched over with concern. That you had to get to your feet and take care of business immediately, in my experience, only delays shock, nothing can prevent it. With the most urgent matters attended to, it is time you were able to feel fragile and treat yourself accordingly. Here we are with the warming blankets. xo
ReplyDeleteThat is the most cruel of all: to do this and GIVE NO EXPLANATION.
ReplyDeleteNobody can understand that.
Love, C.