I'm tired of talking about this here, I'm tired of this being the focus of every day, I am tired I am tired I am tired of not sleeping and the ongoing panic and the anger and loss and betrayal and and and and and and and and
Some moments rise up and smack me in the face, and I pretend it's all okay because it's been a month now -- shouldn't I be getting over this already? -- a month since that D word got under my skin, but, parasite that it is, continues to burrow deeper every day.
And I don't get a choice in this.
In the State of Washington, if a spouse wants a divorce, that spouse gets a divorce. Done and done.
The path from A to Z varies from couple to couple, but the end result is dissolution.
This is losing.
Bad behavior on the part of either spouse: no matter.
Not an issue.
No one cares.
No big deal.
This ain't ethics.
Meanwhile, the glass shards and the briars and splinters and thorns I'm certain that I've swallowed grow more diamond-sharp with each intake of breath.
Wave upon wave, gust after gust, this tempest rages.