Tuesday, September 22, 2009

And yes, I've been quiet lately; contemplative.
Last Wednesday I accompanied R. to his cardiologist
appointment, where he was give the green light
to resume his life. Happiness! Time to let out
a breath, the one I've held in since the break-in
on Memorial Day, and held since. Too much, I say.

And yet. The first day of fall and it's officially 88 degrees
and the sun, the air, is perfect: not humid, not smoggy,
just a clear sail into autumn. Golden days, these.


Scrubbed and scrubbed my fingers at the end
of my workday and still they hold remnants of paint:
irridescent Aztec gold, duochrome bronze,
quinacridone violet. A daily scourge is lamp-black --
no more or less of anything in comparison
to the other colors, but it vexes me,
challenges me, tests any shred of patience
I may hold in reserve. Sullen, intransigent and cocky --
it is the absence of a pearl, a dearth of Champagne,
drugged sleep. Never chocolate wrapped in gold foil.
Never the velvet underside of the cat's paw.


  1. That's great news about R and yes, you're finally through to the other side.

    Don't you wear gloves?

    You say it's the first day of Fall? I don't understand; our Seasons always start on the first day of the month; Dec, Mar, June, Sept.

  2. Alaine -- I didn't know this about your seasons! I've always been amused by the notion that a particular season starts on a particular day...it seems so much more nebulous than that.

    And gloves, no. Too much detail work which actually involves my fingertips.
    But perhaps I should consider them.

  3. Very happy to read that R was given the all clear. My family went through a similar situation over this summer but there was also good news at the end. Good luck with the paint scrubbin'!

  4. any metallic paint calls for the use of gloves....all those heavy metal paints leak into your skin....as a painter I don't use gloves but I don't allow any paint to stay on my hands even for a minute.
    Beautifully written by the way, as usual.

  5. I totally agree with Ima Wizer--protect yourself!